... I don't have much to say.
I should be greatful, I got so many presents under the tree waiting to be opened. I just cant face the thought of going downstairs. I'm a mess.
It's Christmas morning, where all is suppose to be jolly and good. Suppose to be. I have no idea how to put this... School massacres, how do you deal with them? I'm fucking speechless, that's what I fucking well am. The more I think about it, the more the anger brews inside me. I'm like an overheated kettle. Jesus Christ.
I just need to write, and get my mind off of things. But the more I write the more bullshit I come out with, when I speak it doesn't even make sense. Why does it always happen to me? Why the fuck is it, that whenever I move to another school a tragedy has to follow me? This is by far the worst.
I should count my lucky stars that it wasn't me in that room, suffering in silence with nobody there to help. Why did I listen to William and not come in? I should of been there to stop him. I know, I fucking bloody know he wouldn't of killed me like he brutally murdered every single one of them innocent teenagers. He loved me.
My god, I'm loosing my fucking mind sitting here thinking about it. Who would of known that quiet William could've been the defendant of a school massacre. These things don't happen by a click of a finger? But what made him... Who made him... Why did it... So many questions but never enough answers.
Urm, dear diary.
... I dont have much to say other than: My friends are dead, William is in a mental institute, my parents are never going to be happy together, I have to move schools again and finally... Today... It's christmas morning, where all is suppose to be jolly and good. Suppose to be.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pv0hlbWpa1w
(The image of the Christmas tree was suited for this diary entry because I was talking about Christmas day and coming downstairs to receive a lot of presents from my rich father however not being grateful for them because I was too upset about the school massacre I luckily got away from)
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